Learning to love and accept yourself is the greatest gift you’ll ever give yourself.

It's better than that expensive designer bag on your wish list.

Better than those new shoes you've been eyeing off.

And yes, even better than the Euro summer vacation you're no doubt dreaming of!

Problems and challenges don’t fix themselves by doing a geographical for 2 weeks or hitting the shops for a dose of retail therapy.

After the dopamine hit is gone, and the holiday glow fades, you’re still stuck with the same thoughts, behaviours, and stress you had before.
 
What I’ve come to understand on my journey as a coach is that self-love and acceptance doesn’t come easy for most women.

We are our own worst critic. We are the first to blame, body shame, call ourselves stupid, useless, and much much worse.
​
Growing up the concept of self-kindness wasn't always taught to us by the women in our circle, or by teachers at our schools. And sources like social media have become a minefield of judgement and comparison.

​1) Loving yourself enables you to cultivate healthier relationships with others.
​
When you know your own worth, you are less likely to seek validation from external sources and can form genuine connections based on mutual respect and understanding.
 
2) Self-love equips you with the resilience to bounce back from setbacks and challenges.

You develop a deeper sense of self-trust and inner strength, allowing you to face difficulties with courage and grace.
 
3) By embracing self-acceptance, you free yourself from the trap of comparison and perfectionism.

Your inner critic become less concerned with measuring up to others' standards and more focused on nurturing your unique strengths and qualities.

“If I was never taught how to love and accept myself, then where do I even begin?” 
 
✨ Start by becoming aware of your critical thoughts, feelings, and self-talk
 
✨ Commit to treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a close friend
 
✨ When you walk past that mirror – what would you say to your bestie? Would you ridicule her and tear her down OR would you show her compassion and pump up her tires?
 
You always have a choice; you can continue the path you’ve been on and keep get the same results. Or you can make a change and BE the source of love and acceptance in your own life.
 

All the things you don't have... all the things that aren't going well for you?

"I don't have enough X (money, time, friends)
Why can't I have a new X (job, relationship, car, house, handbag, etc) like so-and-so?!?!
I never get the X (good opportunities, promotions, luck)"

Leaving you feeling unfulfilled, and on a constant churn of stress while pushing and striving for more?

It's easy to fall into the trap of longing for all that we don't have. I've certainly done it. Too busy looking over someone else's fence at what they're doing, instead of focusing on being present in my own backyard.
We live in a world that often emphasises comparison and scarcity; Social media is a huge trigger.

If you've been wondering, how to get out of this lack mindset and feel good about your life, you probably don't realise that you have a few things within your control today, that can help you shift your mindset. Even if you stay in exactly the same position you are in.

Here 's how to get started:

​If you are following accounts that make you feel "ick" after scrolling, then mute these accounts for 30 days.

See if you missed the content?? If you did, then go back to it and re-test how you feel after a break. If you didn't miss it at all, and you noticed a positive shift ... then unfollow the account.

Social media's general purpose is for connection and entertainment. If you're not feeling those things, then you won't miss anything that was good for you!

I know, I know... everyone talks about gratitude. But that's because it works! Science tells us that when you shift your focus to appreciate what you already have, you'll feel MORE content.

"I am grateful for... "

Write down 3 things you are grateful for every day, on paper, in a journal, or your phone. I've even had a client who prefers to voice note her gratitude while she walks in the morning! Love it.
 
A few years ago I read a phenomenal book by Louise Hay, called “You can Heal Your Life”.

Louise is the grandmother of self-help books and the queen of affirmations and gratitude. One chapter in the book was really transformation for me. Louise talked about her own feelings of lack around money, and fear of her finances.

To combat this anxiety and overwhelm she use a small shift in language that had a huge impact. Each and every time a bill arrived in her mailbox; she would BLESS THE BILL and say:

"Thank you for the money in my account to pay for this bill. I appreciate this bill, knowing I have the funds to pay for it."

And, somehow she would find the money to pay for the bill, without stress.
​
Wow, what a concept! Even reading this - how different does that feel?

• Celebrate how for you've come

​We often forget the challenges and obstacles we’ve conquered.

We also usually are not comparing apples with apples. We get stuck looking at other people’s success and comparing our apple experience with their orange experience! It just doesn’t make sense.

Celebrate your big and small steps.

“I am proud of myself for … “

• Celebrate what you have NOW

Look around you right now. Where are you sitting? What do you already have around you right now? Little moments happen every day that are proof that you are on your way to abundance, look for them and celebrate those moments.

5 years ago, I used to DREAM of the coaching business I have now! Imagine if I had of given up … because I got stuck in comparison and lack? There was healing, learning and growth I needed in order to become the Coach I am today. It was all worth it!

Author Gabby Berstein in her book Super Attractor has this wonderful concept she uses for celebrating and focusing on abundance.

It’s called “Gathering Twigs”. You create a list on your phone and every time you have a win, something good happens, or there is a sign that shows you that you are on the right track, you write it down.
​
I did this FOR YEARS. And it works. Anytime I felt lack or comparison, I would start a new list. Looks like this:

• And, instead of comparing yourself to someone else... try celebrating other people!

Comparison and judgement lead to resentment. Resentment is like anger, it can be toxic and poisonous. It will eventually eat away at the container it is in.

If you are walking down the street and notice a woman with great shoes, and immediately you feel envy - compliment her. Either out loud to her, or in your mind. Sounds like:

“Wow, amazing shoes, I love them”.

If you are scrolling social media and notice someone who is celebrating and achievement and you immediate feel less than, or upset that you don’t have what she has – celebrate her. Sounds like this:

"Well done, that's amazing. Good for her getting that new (job, relationship, house xyz). I know I am on my way to getting that soon too."

See how different it feel?

Remember, your journey is unique. You can and you will get to where you want to be. Staying present in your life, focusing on gratitude and celebrating your accomplishments is how you will get there.

All the best,
JB

​Have you ever found yourself seeking happiness through external validation?

For years, I placed my happiness in the hands of others, constantly thinking that if certain people or circumstances aligned in a certain way, then I would finally be happy.
​
I would catch myself saying things like, "If my parents, sister, husband, son, boss, colleague, or X did THIS, then I would be happy."

I tied my happiness to achieving good grades, receiving recognition at work, earning a promotion, or even reaching specific milestones in my first business.

My joy was dependent on external factors and the validation they provided.

The problem was, and what I've realised through Mindset Coaching, is that MY long term happiness is an internal job... I am the only one that can change it or make it happen.

Yes, the external factors could give me a temporary hit of happiness, BUT they could never give lasting contentment. Here's why:

* We cannot control the external factors! Or other people's opinion of us

*   We cannot control how much or little someone loves us! Or HOW they specifically show us love

The key was... I had to learn to know, love and accept MYSELF (all facets and parts of me) - in order to find my self-worth and experience a contentment that I never even knew existed.

And the most amazing thing happened, when I stopped seeking external validation...

I got my power back!

​In this video, I share the three crucial steps I took to break free from the cycle of seeking external validation and find true self-worth.

Let me detail the 3 steps I took for you here:

I learned that I cannot control other people's actions, reactions, behaviours or even the way they love and treat me. I cannot control every single outcome, to every situation in my life.

​There will be uncertainty, there will be change, there will be things that do not always go my way. No matter how hard I work or try to make it different. 

I can only control what is within my circle - my mind, my body, my emotions and my behaviours. How I think, reaction and respond is up to me. 

I started my day with a simple shift. In order to love myself fully and build self-worth I need to be the most important person in my world, my needs matter. My own self-care has to be a priority. 

I decided to wake up 15 mins earlier, to sit listening to a short 5 min guided meditation and I did 10 mins of journaling positive affirmations - something I had never done before!  (If you are new to meditation I have a few to help get you started here)

I spent 10 mins stretching and doing yoga, then ate a healthy nourishing breakfast and I listened to music while getting ready for work. 

I found this short 20-30mins of "me-time" first thing in the morning would calm and refocus my mind, before the chaos of the day began.

When I filled my "needs cup" first, I found I wasn't looking to other people or external factors to fill my own needs. 

I began a new habit where once a week I would do something that brough me joy - something just for me. Where I didn't have to do anything for anyone else. 

You see, I began to remember who I was outside of all the labels and hats I wore. Outside of the expectations, demands, stress and achievements of work. 

I started to love and reconnect to my inner child, the part of me that had gotten lost from putting all my happiness eggs outside my own basket. The part of me that was waiting for someone else to love, care and adore me, the way I wanted. 

It's an empowering feeling not waiting for someone to give you everything you need.

I began to breathe easier and smile more often. Life felt less heavy and more enjoyable.  

I realise that it had to start with me, just like it has to start with you.

And I am here to tell you - YOU can absolutely do it too. 

​JB

​Is your best work, or your next career move being robbed by fear and self-doubt? Have you ever felt like you aren’t capable, or haven’t earned the right to be in the position you are in? Do you worry about whether you are good enough?

In the current business environment where supply chains are strained, inflationary pressures are present and many businesses are going through some sort of change and/or transformation, the need for new thinking and ideas is vital.

These challenges can present a fantastic opportunity to show entrepreneurial spirit to solve today’s problems and make a difference. However, the current environment may also be creating additional stress and anxiety due to uncertainty, and the prevalence of burnout and imposter syndrome.

A recent global study conducted by Asana, for the 2022 Anatomy of Work report, surveyed over 10,000 employees to learn what’s working and what’s not in organisations.

According to this research nearly two-thirds (62%) of knowledge workers worldwide reported experiencing imposter syndrome in the last year, with 42% of employees experiencing both burnout and imposter syndrome at the same time.

Imposter syndrome refers to an intense feeling of fraudulence when you doubt your abilities, accomplishments, or skills. The mind often fearing a moment when someone is going to call you out, realise you shouldn’t be there, or you’re not capable for the role.

Even the highest of achievers and most confident and intelligent people can feel this way. It’s not defined by age, gender, or experience level.

KPMG Women’s Leadership Summit Report found that as many as 75% of executive women report to having personally experienced Imposter Syndrome at certain points in their career. The study also discovered that 56% have been afraid the people around them will not believe they are as capable as expected.

Why is this phenomenon so widespread?

If we look at the global external environment since 2020, we’ve spent over 2 years surviving a pandemic, isolating, and pivoting to work from home environments.

Asana’s report found that almost one quarter of workers experienced burnout four or more times in the last year, and 40% of all workers think burnout is an inevitable part of success.

Overwhelm from job uncertainty, increased workloads, and an experience of higher levels of anxiety due to the pandemic coupled with current inflation rates all impacting our daily lives.

With a lack of connection to the workplace there are less opportunities to receive face to face feedback, read body language cues, and have open conversations to discuss challenges outside the zoom room.

The mind can potentially have a field day analysing, overthinking, and rehashing every conversation and scenario of the workday.

“Did I do enough? Was it good enough? What if I wasn’t on point? What will they think of me? Why was I not invited to that meeting? What if I don’t have the capabilities anymore? Will I lose my job?”

The mind is a powerful tool but in some cases self-doubt and fear breed without external validation and connection.

“With fewer opportunities to connect and celebrate success, remote work is intensifying impostor syndrome. Organizations should ensure that work is still being recognized and championed in remote environments on a daily basis, and that new hires have support structures in place to instil confidence.” —DR. SAHAR YOUSEF, COGNITIVE NEUROSCIENTIST, UC BERKELEY (Source Asana)
 
Imposter syndrome is not incurable; you can become fearless by learning how to cultivate a growth mindset shifting your thinking when flooded with fear-based thoughts and feelings of incompetence. Coaching and training have been found to be two positive solutions to overcoming this fear.

In a study done to evaluate the effectiveness of interventions for reducing the imposter phenomenon results reveal that coaching was an effective mindset intervention for sustainably reducing imposter phenomenon scores. Coaching improved self-enhancing attributions and self-efficacy and reduced the tendency to cover up errors as well as the fear of negative evaluation. Training was superior in regard to knowledge acquisition. (Zanchetta et al. 2020).

Becoming fearless first begins with acknowledging when imposter feelings show up, then refraining from allowing the fears to hold you back or derail you from taking action.

Here are 4 steps to guide you when facing imposter syndrome:

  1. Recognise when the feelings arise, awareness always proceeds change.  

  2. Identify the specific fear or doubt you are feeling. 

  “What specifically am I afraid of here?” or
  “What is causing me to feel this way?”

  3. Review the facts; feelings are not facts.

  “When did I decide that I am not capable of (X)” or
  “Where is the proof this person thinks (X) about me?”

  4. Reframe the thought process, using the power of positive language.  

• I am capable of producing great outcomes
• I have the skill and attributes to succeed in this role
• I am experienced and worthy of my success
• I belong here I am accepted for my talents
• My work is valued I deserve this praise
• I am good enough

It can be very unsettling to discover that you’re experiencing imposter syndrome. Given the stigma around this topic, many people might feel like they just have to push through and suffer in silence. You don’t, and the real story is in how you face the fear to rebuild your self-belief. Connection and opening conversations at work are also key. You might even be surprised when you share your experience and people understand exactly what you are going through.

Don’t let fear hold you back from your dreams and goals.

Schedule a free consultation with me to learn more about what I can do for you, and how mindset coaching can help you, to overcome imposter syndrome.

JB.

Unable to be five steps ahead of everything and everyone. No longer having that focus and motivation for exercise and eating to take care of their body.

You are learning more about yourself and the people in your immediate world, than you probably ever have before. The intricate details of …

• What is most important to you and what you really want
• How to live and work under the same roof
• What decision fatigue looks like after 8 hours on zoom and how best you recharge your batteries
• What snack and bartering tools work best with the demanding little people if your life
• If you live alone… who means the most to you, and who you are ok with letting go
• How to manage emotions when you are triggered by anxiety, frustration, sadness, loss, disappointment
• How bloody resilient you really are!!

And, if you have the pleasure of home schooling like me add re-learning Grade 2 to that list (argh!).

​The body you are unhappy with right now, can absolutely make a comeback. The job that you cannot stand, might feel different when your office returns or after a holiday (or maybe it’s the push for you to make a change). The relationship that is causing you frustration, will hopefully look different when we can have more room to breathe and external outlets.
 
And that goal or achievement that you set a date for and missed, doesn’t mean the goal isn’t worthwhile! Zoom out and see the bigger picture, perhaps there has been more to learn on the way to that goal you want to so much?
 
In my map of the world, there is NO failure. There is ONLY feedback.
 
Notching your failures is what keeps you feeling stuck, literally reliving the past with your mindset fixed on “I failed - it will never happen”. 

Where as a growth mindset says “What I can learn from, I can change” which keeps you moving forward (and feels so much lighter doesn't it?!)

Answer that first, and then shift your goal posts. 

So, how do you get unstuck?

1. There is no failure only FEEDBACK
2. WIPE THE SLATE CLEAN of the past and start fresh
3. Set REALISTIC goals for your energy and productivity capacity right now knowing that things will change in the future
4. BE KIND to yourself
5. Do what you can when you can and that is GOOD ENOUGH!

Side note: I really hope that if you are reading this and still in lock down that the only goal you are setting for yourself right now is focused on your health and happiness! I know your world being on pause is frustrating, I feel it too.

Let's be honest - NO ONE is really achieving right now!

​I don’t care what you are seeing on social media. Everyone is hurting from this pandemic. Everyone is just doing the best they can to survive and make it through. And if they are achieving then I have no doubt that something else has had to give.
 
I am a firm believer that you can do anything, you just cannot do everything to 110% all at once without a ball dropping somewhere!
 
Take care
​JB

​I had a client recently, who was struggling with imposter syndrome, can you relate?

My client felt like she wasn't good enough for this role and her confidence had taken a hit after some disappointing feedback from a Manager she really liked.

To be honest, her self-belief pillars were totally shaken.

After just one session of getting really clear on who she was and what she wanted she saw her confidence start to return and her work anxiety lessen.

That is the power of the mind!

Ps. If you want to learn more about the 4-session coaching program I talk about in this blog you'll find it here -> CAREER MINDSET RESET ​

​​Today’s blog is all about building confidence in the workplace and comes from a recent "Career Mindset Reset" session I had with one of my clients, who was looking for advice on how to feel more confident as she steps into a new role and organization.  

If you are struggling with confidence at work too - this is your lucky day! I break down my 5 steps to building your confidence at work, focusing on: time, skill, experience, remin​ders, and self-belief.​

1. TIME

Before you feel confident in anything you need time, you need a transition period as you learn and adapt to the role, figure out who’s who in the zoo, start building rapport with your colleagues and boss, and eventually settle into some kind of flow.

You simply cannot expect to understand and know everything on day one, week one, or even month one. Learning and confidence takes time, so be kind and don’t rush yourself. Know that things take time, but you will absolutely get there.

2. SKILL

If you're in a job, role or business where you don’t feel confident you probably have fears like:

• Am I doing this right?
• Am I the right person for this job?
• Do I really have what it takes?

In order to make you feel more confident and capable, first take a look and map out your skillset.

• Write down your degrees, awards, qualifications, and any courses or training you’ve done. 
• Write down all the skills and practices that have helped you hit career highlights and milestones.
• Think about what people come to you for help with and what you’re always getting complements about.

Now look at all of those amazing skills you probably didn’t even realise you had! Amazing isn’t it?!

After mapping out your skillset, maybe you realise there are a couple of gaps. Yes? No problem!

• Is there someone you can reach out to for mentorship and guidance?
• Is there a teacher, coach, or guide you could enlist?
• Is there a course you can take to learn, relearn, or upscale your knowledge?

​Taking the time to map out your skills can help you see everything you already have to offer while also narrowing in on areas you might want some training or assistance with.

3. EXPERIENCE

After time to adjust, and the getting to know your skills comes experience. You need experience and practice using your skills and skill sets, because there’s no way you’ll feel confident in something if you have no experience using that skill. You simply cannot expect to be confident and know what you're straight away, especially if it’s a relatively new or unpractised skill. Instead it takes trial and error, daily consistency, and sometimes failing or even sucking at things before you actually learn and have the experience necessary to build up your confidence.

Take myself for example. I cringe at some my early mindset coaching videos, but I practiced and learned, and built up my experience so that now I produce better quality content that I’m extremely proud of. I have the experience of trial and error and reflection to feel confident in what I produce.
It takes time to build experience, and that’s okay. People understand. And the more you do it and repeat the experiences you’ll build up that confidence.

4. REMINDERS

I had a client come to me once and say, "I just don't feel experienced enough", to which I said, "How do you know you aren't? When did you decide? Is this your standard or someone else's?"

The next thing I asked her was to create a career timeline and look back asking herself:
​

• What did I learn?
• What work did I produce?
• What did I achieve?
• What experience did I gain?

In doing this exercise there was a light bulb moment (there always is!) where she realised her lack of confidence was actually coming from her OWN mind. Seeing it in black and white she had the realisation that she’s already achieved so much and actually does have the skills and experience. She just needed to be reminded.

5. SELF-BELIEF

Belief in yourself and your skills, abilities, and experience is my last tip in building confidence and helping you see that you ARE capable and anything IS possible. Like everything else, is takes practice to really get comfortable with self-belief, and positive affirmations can absolutely help with this.

Writing affirmations in your journal, reading them to yourself, and saying them out loud every single day will 100% embed these positive affirmations into your mind and shift your mindset and confidence.

Here a few to get you going:
​

• The work I produce is amazing!
• I am valued and opportunities flow easily and effortlessly to me
• I am experienced and capable  
• I am good enough!

If you're interested in exploring any of these confidence-boosting tips, I run a single two hour workshop called "Silencing Your Inner Critic" where I help women understand their major limitations and the power of self-belief. If you want to explore more check out my one-on-one coaching offering, comment below, or send me an email ([email protected]).

As a Mindset + Business Coach, the question I’m asked most often is:

“Janel, what’s the ONE THING I can do on a regular basis that’ll make the biggest positive difference in my life?”. 

My answer? 100% your morning routine. 

The things we do every day make a difference. They make a difference to our mental and physical health and wellbeing, to our mindset, and to how we head into and experience the day. It’s the “little things” we incorporate into our routines and practice every day that can make the biggest overall difference. 

Now the tips and suggestions I’m about to share with you probably aren’t anything new. Many of us already KNOW the practices that are good for us, the trick is actually DOING those things.

Meditate, journal, exercise, eat well; we know these are building blocks to thriving and making us feel better. The difficulty is putting one foot in front of the other to get started… and then to keep it going. 

Sometimes the biggest block is that it all just seems so overwhelming… if I'm going to start a new morning routine, then it means I have to get up at 5:00am. Then I need to spend an hour and a half doing ALL THE THINGS to fill my mind, move my body, and get ready mentally and physically for the day. And next? Wham, there's an extra hundred million things to add to an already full morning. 

Enter your mind saying, “This is too hard. There’s too much to do. Forget it. No deal.”
Now stop.

First, don't think about the 50 million things you have to do tomorrow, this week, this month, etc… 

Instead, focus on what you can do TODAY. 

Focus on the one LITTLE thing you can do today, that can be incorporated and repeated tomorrow, and the day after. Focus on the ONE THING you can do today, incorporate it slowly and gently into your morning, and then become consistent at it over time. 

If you have one of my Learn to Thrive journals  you know all about incorporating small changes over time. I call the morning routine “Five to Thrive”, and once you’ve gently incorporated all five into your morning routine it will look like this:

• 10 minutes of journal writing
• 10 minutes of meditation
• 10 minutes of moving my body
• Eating a healthy breakfast
• Listening to music 

These are my non-negotiables every single day. Why? Because they help set me up for a thriving day. It’s 30 minutes every morning that sets my body and mindset for a happier and healthier day.
Now you try.

Start with waking up just 10 minutes earlier tomorrow and choosing ONE THING (not ALL the things!) to add in.

After you’ve chosen this one thing, do it consistently for the next 30 days. Do this one thing (and only this one thing!) until you’re comfortable with it. Only when you’re comfortable with it is it time to incorporate something else. 

So now that you’re comfortable with it, the next day you get up another 10 minutes earlier, and add ONE more thing, commit to it for the next 30 days, and so on.

Does this seem slow? 

Maybe. 

But see it’s all about baby steps and simplicity. No complexity and no overwhelm. 
We’re aiming for one thing to be incorporated slowly and steadily over time. And the compound effect of this gentle routine on your mindset? 

Trust me, it is truly, truly incredible. 

You start feeling more comfortable and confident in yourself and in your days. You wake up each morning, practice your routine and eventually find that you feel amazing. You feel amazing and your days and weeks and months are running smoother because you've been meditating every day, been writing in your journal every day, been moving your body every day, been eating a nutritious breakfast every day, been listening to music every day. 

This compound effect of all these “little things”? AMAZING!

Feeling motivated to get started? Do it! 

Not so motivated? Don’t wait! 

Why? Because you may never feel motivated to start, especially if it’s something new (or involves getting up earlier). Instead, take the leap, set your alarm, and jump in. Choose the one thing you’re going to start with and just start.

Will it be easy? Maybe. That’s why taking gentle steps over time helps. 

But sometimes however you might need additional support along this morning routine journey. If this is the case, follow me at janelbriggs_thrive on Instagram and see how I use the "five to thrive " method or simply email me, [email protected] - I'd love to hear from you!

Take care, JB

Anxiety is 100% the physical response your body has to fear. Sometimes the fear stems from a real threat. If you’ve ever been bushwalking and seen a snake you would be absolutely grateful your body responds to the threat and triggers you to move to safety.

More generally in our everyday life or work-home-sleep-repeat the fear typically comes from an imagined danger. Meaning that the fear emotion is caused by our own thoughts. Things (or obsessing!) about the future and all the unknowns is what actually triggers the fear.

​Your worried and fearful thoughts then spark a hormone response in your body. Your body is flushed with cortisol and adrenaline, stress hormones as the fight or flight mode gets turned on. Your body thinks it needs to act on these fearful thoughts and either get you out of the situation or fight it.

The anxiety symptoms you get may differ from the woman next to you - stomach-ache, racing heart, racing mind, the shakes, loss of appetite, shortness of breath, muscle tension, insomnia etc
The problem is that the body is amped up, just from what you’ve been thinking!
The stress hormones have nowhere to release.

The good news in all of this is that I “thinking” got you in the situation, then our thoughts can be changed and ultimately get us out of it!

If you suffer anxiety, the key to freeing yourself is learning how to master your mind, and doing some work to heal your unconscious belief system and release that base level emotion of fear.

​The flow on effect is that our body response changes!

So, if you are ready to release the fear here are my 3 steps to help you start to learn to shift your anxiety:

I bet you’ve looped around in your mind down a rabbit hole of “what if this and what if that happens” over analysing and over thinking every possible scenario of this situation GOING WRONG.

It is basically your imagination having a field day. Triggered by that first fearful worried thought.
So, when the loop starts, I want you to catch yourself. Sometimes that is the hardest step. Catch the thought process before it spirals. If you can do that, you can master anything.

First things first move your body, go for a walk, get some fresh air, take some deep square breaths. Get out of the space you were in. You want to move your body and shift that flush of stress hormones. Remember the fear from your mind has just flooded your body with hormones.

Then Ask yourself: Is this a real or imagined scenario?

Am I on the “what if” loop Janel was talking about AND imagining every possible scenario going wrong, and being the worst it could ever be?

Say to yourself “This situation is not real. It is not set in stone. It has not happened. I am safe, I am safe, I am safe”

Use this like a mantra and keep repeating it until the feeling begins to lighten as you realise that this is your imagination taking you places that you do not need to go.

Break it down into specifics to get clear on the fear:

• What am I afraid of? Slow down, and tune in. 
• What specifically am I anxious about? 
• Why is that a concern?
• What are you specifically worried about in THAT concern?
• How is that a problem for you right now?
• What is this stopping you from doing, or causing you to do right now? Are you lashing out? Are you an emotional wreck?

And once you’ve got specific about it then get rationalise it, lets shine some reality on it!

Ask yourself “What would happen if this thing, that you now realise you’ve imagined in your mind, did actually happen?

On a scale of 1-10 how likely is it that this could actually happen.

And if it did how bad would it be? Is it really as bas as what you’ve imagined which is the sky is falling.

Sometimes our imagination has us down a rabbit hole and in reality, on the scale the event actually happening is like a 2-3, or but the fear in us triggered as a 10.

This step is all about perspective.
​

Why is Anxiety is showing up in your life?

This may be an entirely new concept for you, and it may or may not resonate and I’m ok either way.

I’m talking about the WHY – have you ever asked yourself WHY is this fear showing up in your life? What do I need to learn?

A growth mindset says that everything we go through, every challenge every obstacle is an opportunity to learn and shift and grow.

Tad James, one of the founders on Neuro Linguistics Programming, the coaching modality that I have been professionally trained in states that :

“Anxiety is your unconscious mind telling you to focus on what you want” – this body response you are having is reminding you to stop and focus on what you want instead of what you don’t want.

So, what is your anxiety trying to tell you?

Maybe even instead of hating on your anxiety could you shift your perspective and see your anxiety as a signal from a friend within?

And when you start to feel anxious you realise this friend is asking for your attention? She wants you to wake up. She wants to work with you, there is something she wants to tell you.

So, ask her – ok friend you’ve got my attention. What am I focusing on? Am I focusing on what I want, or what I do not want?  

• Ask – what do I want here?
• Is that toxic job or friendship or relationships not what I want? And yet I continue to keep going back?
• Do I keep pushing myself to do things in situations, or for other people that I really do not want to do?

This concept may take some time to ponder, but this is what I am here for!

I am here as a Mindset Coach to stretch your conscious and unconscious thought process to help you get back to thriving.

If you struggle with Anxiety and you would like to find freedom from this grip of fear in your life, then I would love to help you.

I run a 2 session short program that will help you to identify the root cause or event that has programmed your anxiety and release it. You’ll get an understanding of the specifics of what triggers your anxiety. And you leave the session with an amazing tool – you will learn my anxiety release technique to have help you in future.

Email me here or comment below for more information!

Take care, 
JB