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*TRIGGER WARNING* In honour of World Suicide Prevention Day (Sep 10th 2023) This email talks about grief in losing a loved one to suicide, and how you can support someone you love through a mental health crisis.
Three years ago, I tragically lost my dearest friend to suicide.
A beautiful fun-loving soul, the kind of woman who had a smile and laughter that lit up the room. We connected on a deep level, even though she was 12 years younger. I think it’s because we shared similar personal, life and spiritual values. We had an interest in so many of the same things, from learning and travel, to cooking and our love for animals. We loved nothing more than to go for lunch in a cosy cafe and sit chatting for hours over cups of tea.
Her tragic death taught me many lessons about life, the world, the medical system and myself.
I've come to realise the hardest part of grief, in losing someone you love to suicide - is the guilt.
Could I, should I … have done more?
The answer in the mind is always yes. If I had my time again of course I would do so many things differently.
But, in my heart I know I did the best I could at the time.
Part of the healing process has been to look at my actions and reactions in this event with my mentor and she taught me something extremely important:
Hindsight is a beautiful thing, but no amount of overthinking it will bring peace or bringher back. Acceptance is the key to healing.
I’ve come to realise that my fear of “losing her” in her mental and physical health battle kept my mind clouded and captive. My voice of fear said:
“What if I say the wrong thing and she dies? I don’t know the answers for how to help her in THIS pain”.
Instead of tuning into my voice of wisdom:
“You can never say the wrong thing when it comes from a place of love. What if you say the right thing and she lives?”.
This is why I am so passionate about helping women with anxiety to learn how to quiet their voice of fear and tap into the loving kindness of their intuition, their voice of wisdom.
By encouraging, understanding, reaching in, and sharing experiences with others, Suicide Prevention Day is about giving people confidence to take action to prevent suicide
Grief, as you probably know if you've experienced the it, has this way of stripping your heart bare to the darkest depths of your soul. And somehow over time your heart begins to slowly mend the cracks.
I guess is the power of healing and love. But, you are for sure never the same person again.
The anniversary of her passing each year coinciding with World Suicide Prevention week every September I know as a message for me to remember to, and not be afraid to, tell her story.
I will continue to bring light where I can to the darkness. She is worth it, and so are you.
This is a message for anyone who has a loved one or friend who struggles with their mental health.
HOW YOU CAN HELP SOMEONE YOU LOVE IN A