• 1:1 Coaching
    • Rediscover Your Spark
    • Client Testimonials
  • Anxiety Relief
    • Free Affirmations
    • Free Meditations
    • Becoming Fearless (eBook)
    • Anxiety Relief Collection
    • 7-Day Anixety Mini-Course
  • Shop
  • About
    • My Story
    • FAQ >
      • What is NLP and TimeLine Therapy?
      • What are limiting beliefs?
      • What are Negative Emotions
      • Relieving stress & anxiety
      • What is a growth mindset?
      • Can Meditation remove negative thoughts?
    • Contact
  • Blog
  • 1:1 Coaching
    • Rediscover Your Spark
    • Client Testimonials
  • Anxiety Relief
    • Free Affirmations
    • Free Meditations
    • Becoming Fearless (eBook)
    • Anxiety Relief Collection
    • 7-Day Anixety Mini-Course
  • Shop
  • About
    • My Story
    • FAQ >
      • What is NLP and TimeLine Therapy?
      • What are limiting beliefs?
      • What are Negative Emotions
      • Relieving stress & anxiety
      • What is a growth mindset?
      • Can Meditation remove negative thoughts?
    • Contact
  • Blog
Thrive Mindset Coaching
  • 1:1 Coaching
    • Rediscover Your Spark
    • Client Testimonials
  • Anxiety Relief
    • Free Affirmations
    • Free Meditations
    • Becoming Fearless (eBook)
    • Anxiety Relief Collection
    • 7-Day Anixety Mini-Course
  • Shop
  • About
    • My Story
    • FAQ >
      • What is NLP and TimeLine Therapy?
      • What are limiting beliefs?
      • What are Negative Emotions
      • Relieving stress & anxiety
      • What is a growth mindset?
      • Can Meditation remove negative thoughts?
    • Contact
  • Blog

THE NEXT CHAPTER

GUIDANCE FOR WOMEN NAVIGATING MAJOR LIFE TRANSITIONS & THE JOURNEY BACK TO THEMSELVES
Don't miss a thing! Subscribe for free weekly coaching inspiration and support
SUBSCRIBE NOW



    Author

    Janel Briggs
    Empowering Women to Become Fearless & Confident through Major Career & Life Transitions

    Categories

    All
    Affirmations
    Anxiety
    Burnout
    Business
    Career
    Christmas
    Coaching
    Communication
    Comparison
    Criticism
    Fear
    Fear Of Failure
    Goal
    Goal Setting
    Growth Mindset
    Habit Change
    Identity Crisis
    Imposter Syndrome
    Job Satisfaction
    Judgement
    Mental Health
    Mindfulness
    Mindset
    Morning Routine
    Overwhelm
    People Pleasing
    Perfectionism
    Relationships
    Self Care
    Self-care
    Stress
    Success
    Suicide Prevention
    Validation
    Values
    Worry

    RSS Feed

Back to Blog

Learning to Love Yourself Better

11/4/2024

 
Picture
Learning to love and accept yourself is the greatest gift you’ll ever give yourself.

It's better than that expensive designer bag on your wish list.

Better than those new shoes you've been eyeing off.

And yes, even better than the Euro summer vacation you're no doubt dreaming of!

Problems and challenges don’t fix themselves by doing a geographical for 2 weeks or hitting the shops for a dose of retail therapy.

After the dopamine hit is gone, and the holiday glow fades, you’re still stuck with the same thoughts, behaviours, and stress you had before.
 
What I’ve come to understand on my journey as a coach is that self-love and acceptance doesn’t come easy for most women.

We are our own worst critic. We are the first to blame, body shame, call ourselves stupid, useless, and much much worse.
​
Growing up the concept of self-kindness wasn't always taught to us by the women in our circle, or by teachers at our schools. And sources like social media have become a minefield of judgement and comparison.

However, self-love and acceptance are the two biggest foundations for a positive and fulfilling life!​


​1) Loving yourself enables you to cultivate healthier relationships with others.

​

When you know your own worth, you are less likely to seek validation from external sources and can form genuine connections based on mutual respect and understanding.
 
2) Self-love equips you with the resilience to bounce back from setbacks and challenges.

You develop a deeper sense of self-trust and inner strength, allowing you to face difficulties with courage and grace.
 
3) By embracing self-acceptance, you free yourself from the trap of comparison and perfectionism.

Your inner critic become less concerned with measuring up to others' standards and more focused on nurturing your unique strengths and qualities.
Picture

But of course, the million-dollar question is…

“If I was never taught how to love and accept myself, then where do I even begin?” 
 
✨ Start by becoming aware of your critical thoughts, feelings, and self-talk
 
✨ Commit to treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a close friend
 
✨ When you walk past that mirror – what would you say to your bestie? Would you ridicule her and tear her down OR would you show her compassion and pump up her tires?
 
You always have a choice; you can continue the path you’ve been on and keep get the same results. Or you can make a change and BE the source of love and acceptance in your own life.
 

Picture
About the Author: 
Janel Briggs is an Author, Mindset Coach, Practitioner of NLP and Timeline Therapy on a mission to support women across the world in overcoming their  anxiety - personal insecurities and professional fears - to build unwavering confidence and self-belief. Mindset Coaching aims to help you fearlessly elevate your life and career, and more importantly the relationship you have with yourself! Connect with Janel on social media via Linkedin or Instagram.

Picture
0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

Where Are You on the Priority List?

3/3/2024

 
Here's a reflection for all the care-takers out there. The mothers, fur-mama's and women in relationships who spend most of their time caring and holding space for other people (whether it be your partner, children, family, or in your friendships).

I want to ask you a question:

Where are you on the priority list of your life?

​Recently, I had to ask myself this question. And it's VERY interesting what came up!
 
Last week my husband and I decided to invest in private 1:1 coaching for our son (who is 10yo) for a sport he loves. This coaching would help him to build more confidence and fine tune his skills. I did my research, got a referral, and the quote came back at $200 for a number of sessions. 

It was literally a split-second decision - YES, let's do it!

Within 24hrs the first session was set up. It was a "no-brainer" for us to spend $200 on our son's progression in this sport, his happiness is high on our priority list.
​

On the flipside, I reflected on how I would have responded if the tables were turned a few years ago. I wondered how long it would have taken me to DECIDED to spend that same $200 on myself??


Perhaps you could ask yourself the same thing?

I can tell you, the decision would have taken wayyyy longer than 24hrs!! My mind would have been spinning thinking about all the justifications, the pro's and con's, in an attempt to ward off the overwhelming feeling of... GUILT.
​
"I can't do that, I can't spend that much on myself... it's too much! I'll find another way. I'll get another quote. I'll wait to see if I REALLY NEED IT."
​

Picture

You may have had a similar response or mindset too?

I've had clients tell me they're kids are always dressed in the best clothes - yet they're still wearing those old shoes with the hole in them they bought 5 years ago!
​
Or, they'll even pay for the finest food, toys and new beds for they're fur babies - yet they're still using a broken hair brush from 2012!

Or, they won't even blink an eye at loaning a family member or friend money to support their idea or dream - yet won't do the same for themselves!
​

WHY ARE WE LIKE THIS??

Honestly, I believe it comes down to priority and self-value. Where we place ourselves on our own priority list matters.

We forget about how important it is to invest in ourselves, in our own progression, healing and growth.

I can tell you that in every decision I used to make - I was at the bottom of my priority list.
Somehow in my role as the "responsible care-taker" in my immediate and extended family I thought else's needs came before mine.

What I came to realise (after hitting a rock bottom with my mental health in 2017!) is that my needs and taking care of myself HAD to come FIRST.

I needed to be a top priority in my life, instead of bottom of the list.
​

If I couldn't make myself a priority and voice my needs - then how would anyone else ever make me a priority too? 
​


​My last questions for you is this:

How can you move yourself up the priority list this week

  • Understand where you are on your own priority list
  • Put time and energy into shifting your mindset focusing on your needs
  • Release the guilt & do the thing!

​And if you have any questions or comments on how to get started - please reach out!


Picture
About the Author: 
Janel Briggs is an Author, Mindset Coach, Practitioner of NLP and Timeline Therapy on a mission to support women across the world in overcoming their  anxiety - personal insecurities and professional fears - to build unwavering confidence and self-belief. Mindset Coaching aims to help you fearlessly elevate your life and career, and more importantly the relationship you have with yourself! Connect with Janel on social media via Linkedin or Instagram.

Picture
0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

When Christmas Isn't Sparking JOY

17/12/2023

 
This time of year can bring up big emotions for people. 

Not only do we have the overwhelming rush to the end of year finish line, but we also have so much added stress with “Christmas is coming”. 

I want you to know that if you are not joyously cruising into Christmas and the end of year, it’s OK.
You are not alone.  
Picture

You're not a bad person or the “Christmas Grinch”.  ​

​You’re probably just extremely overwhelmed, burnt out, beyond tired and perhaps at capacity with everyone and everything!

Christmas and the new year often brings up anxiety!  

I know this feeling. I spent a few years of my life dreading Christmas day and  the stress that comes from juggling “family relationships" and having to “act normal” when I felt way less than normal.  

It’s plain hard to be joyful when your mind feels scrambled and you've got zero energy left in the tank.  
​
Not to mention that pressure of staring down the road to 2024 … thinking what am I doing with my life? Why am I still so far away from where I should be? And how the hell am I going grin and bear it and avoid these questions from people at all those Christmas parties?! 
​
Picture

If you resonate with any of this, here is an approach for you

​If you resonate with any of this, here is an approach for you:

Honour your feelings. 
 
It’s OK to be feeling this way, there are many other who feel the same right now too but probably aren't talking about it.
There’s no doubt you’ve been juggling a lot this year and likely just need time and space to process your thoughts, feelings and emotions.  

It’s ok to say No. 
 
I remember one year when my family asked me to host Christmas Day lunch and I was struggling with my mental health. My anxiety immediately triggered at the thought of seeing everyone in my home roll up with Esky’s full of alcohol and drinking all day.
I knew that my head and nervous system could not handle any alcohol fueled arguments or stress.  
 
So, with the help of my mentor I crafted some words to create a boundary that honoured my feelings. I wrote to each family member and told them I would host, but if it was at my house, it would be an alcohol-free day. They agreed, respected my wishes and came along. They ate the food, opened presents, left early and went on to be merry somewhere else!
By all accounts for me it was a GREAT DAY. Zero anxiety, and lots of laughs. 

Focus on self-care.    

Perhaps this is what your holiday break is about, a time for rest and recharge rather than all the Christmas ‘tis. Less giving energy out, more recouping energy in. Do things that bring you comfort and relaxation.

You don’t have to have it all figured out by December 31st.  

In actual fact December 31 is just another day in the calendar. Take a breath and release the pressure. Everything will work itself out in time. Go slow and be kind to yourself.  Ande let this be your reminder to take a breather. You can and you will get to that end of year finish line. 

 
And please take care out there, if you're stressed and emotions are high remember that there are many others that are too. 

All the best,
​JB.

Picture
​About the Author: 

Janel Briggs is an Author, Mindset Coach, Practitioner of NLP and Timeline Therapy on a mission to support women across the world in overcoming their  anxiety - personal insecurities and professional fears - to build unwavering confidence and self-belief. Mindset Coaching aims to help you fearlessly elevate your life and career, and more importantly the relationship you have with yourself! Connect with Janel on social media via Linkedin or Instagram.

0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

Managing 'Hangxiety' and Christmas Cheers

3/12/2023

 
‘Tis the season! 

​As we launch into the festive season, the joy of celebrations and increased social events often intertwines with gatherings that involve a bit of indulgence – food, alcohol, merriment - all the things!  

However, I know for some, the aftermath of these merry nights can lead to a what we call 'hangxiety' - a combination of hangover symptoms and heightened anxiety.

URGH, awful.  
Picture

​If you’ve ever found yourself waking up feeling on-edge, super anxious, worrying about something you might have said or done after a night out of fun and drinking, rest assured - you're not alone. 
​
'Hangxiety' is a common experience shared by many women, so I want to help you understand the cause better to so you can manage through it and breathe easier this holiday season!
​

Our Body + Alcohol 

The science behind 'hangxiety' is rooted in the intricate workings of our brains when alcohol is consumed: 
​
  • Alcohol is actually a central nervous system depressant that causes the brain activity to slow down.  
 
  • Initially, the effects of alcohol in our body brings on feelings of relaxation and ease, we feel happy and less inhibited. GREAT for those merry social situations! 
 
  • As the night progresses though and during sleep the alcohol in our body begins to wear off, and the brain goes into action to restore its chemical equilibrium.  
 
  • This process is called a “glutamine rebound” a bio-chemical reaction that reduces calmness and increases glutamate to restore “normal operation”. The body going into this ‘quick fix me response’ is the exact thing that heightens feelings of anxiety when we wake up in the morning!
 
  • Alcohol is also a massive sleep disruptor! Studies tell us that a lack of deep sleep = anxiety is 30% more likely to trigger!! 
​
Picture

​If you’re interested in learning about how alcohol + sleep affect  anxiety I cover this topic in detail in my new book “Becoming Fearless” – The Complete Guide to Anxiety Relief  along with 12+ anxiety relief tools!

Women vs Men’s 'Hangxiety'

Women tend to metabolise alcohol differently to men due to differences in body composition and our enzyme levels. This can result in a quicker rise in blood alcohol concentration while drinking and intensify both the initial “calming effects” and subsequent “glutamine rebound” = anxiety. 
​
Women who are already prone to anxiety are more susceptible to experiencing intensified 'hangxiety' after drinking. Reason being - our body’s anxiety alarm system is super in tune with hormone fluctuations and likely in a pattern of triggering to negative or worried thoughts!  
​

How to Cope with Post-Drinking Anxiety 

Picture
​The duration of the ‘hangxiety’ feeling will vary person to person, typically peaking the day after and lasting up to 24 hours or longer, depending on factors like how much alcohol you drank and physical/emotional/mental conditions (aka if you’re in a high stress period/already anxious mindset then look out - symptoms will be intensified!).  

Waking up with fragmented memories from the previous night can also contribute to post-drinking stress of course.  

Dealing with 'hangxiety' requires a high level of self-compassion. This is where you need to remind yourself -


  • You are not going crazy, you’ve done nothing wrong 
​
  • No one hates you, you’re NOT an embarrassment 
​
  • There is a bio-chemical reaction happening in your body while it processes last night’s alcohol that’s causing you to feel anxious 
​
  • Everything will be ok again in 24 hours, drink some water and sleep it off
​
  • You’ll be ok, this won't last forever​ ​

Do something to distract and relax your mind, such as watching a favourite show or practicing mindfulness through meditation, aids in easing 'hangxiety.' And avoid consuming more alcohol or stimulant’s like coffee, which can just exacerbate anxiety. 
​

‘Hangxiety’ Prevention 

If you want to prevent 'hangxiety' it will involvessome moderation and mindful drinking and I also believe assessing where you’re at emotionally and mentally before you drink is key.  

  • Current high level stress/negative emotions = more intense ‘hangxiety’. 
​
  • Limiting your alcohol consumption during social events, can notably diminish its likelihood.  
​
  • Eat a good meal prior to drinking, don’t expect there will ever be enough canapes to go around at a work event! 
​
  • If you’re at an event and booze is free-flowing, perhaps telling the waiter to not fill up your glass until it’s empty so you can keep track.
​
  • Drink water in between, stay hydrated. If you feel pressure from 'not drinking' ask yourself - "what's more important? Me drinking now, or not having hangxiety tomorrow?"
​
  • And if you’re already feeling anxious - avoiding alcohol all together is the best action 😉

​By understanding how the body works and the triggers, and implementing a few preventive measures and coping strategies, I hope 'hangxiety' won’t overshadow this year’s festive cheer for you! 


Picture
​About the Author: 

Janel Briggs is an Author, Mindset Coach, Practitioner of NLP and Timeline Therapy on a mission to support women across the world in overcoming their  anxiety - personal insecurities and professional fears - to build unwavering confidence and self-belief. Mindset Coaching aims to help you fearlessly elevate your life and career, and more importantly the relationship you have with yourself! Connect with Janel on social media via Linkedin or Instagram.
0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

This one is for all the Overthinkers

13/11/2023

 
Do you ever find your mind spinning about all the “what if’s” and the “unknowns” within a problem or situation and you just can’t seem to shut those damn thoughts off?  

Overthinking is something that happens to the best of us, and it’s a sure-fire trigger for anxiety.  

It’s kind of like there’s a dance party going on in your mind with all these thoughts on a wild and random playlist. You’re expecting “Sunday Chill” and get delivered “Hard Rock Hits of 1990”. YIKES! 

When things get too chaotic, we often forget that we are the DJ of the crazy party going on in our mind. We can take control of the playlist, even if the volume of the music feels a little loud and out of our control.

We can dial it down. But how? 

This week, perhaps start by recognizing when you are overthinking and practice interrupting the pattern of thought.

Instead of feeding the train of thoughts with MORE questions and scenarios on the overthinking train, try to disrupt the flow and change the tune.
 
 
Here is a recent video I did for my overthinkers on Instagram which will help!
Picture
Overthinking is  very common in women who experience anxiety.

In fact I’ve dedicated a whole chapter to understanding “why we overthink” in my new book, Becoming Fearless launching next Tuesday Nov 21.
 
Here is a sneak peak of some things I share that can help to quiet down the internal noise: 
  •  Take a few controlled deep breaths re-focus your mind on your breath for 30 seconds 
  •  Get busy doing a different activity, opposite to the problem you’re overthinking 
  •  Go for a walk and get a change of scenery 
  •  Journal it, often putting pen to paper helps release the thoughts in our mind. Write a pro’s and con’s list or dot points 
  •  Replace those racing thoughts with something positive, like an affirmation  
  •  Call a friend and talk about a comforting topic that has NOTHING to do with the problem (very important – stop giving it fuel) 
 
It takes practice, but honestly from experience there is no amount of rehashing a problem that will help find a resolution in THAT moment if you’re anxious.  
​
When our thoughts are like a loud party, then we don’t have space to listen to our inner voice of intuition who is trying to give us advice! Shift focus and come back to it at another time. 


This is your reminder: 

Sometimes we have to let go of the problem before we can figure it out. The same thinking that got us into the problem, won't always get us out of it!
​

Picture

​​Ps. You can learn more about Becoming Fearless here and jump on the waitlist to get a copy. It's packed full of actionable tips and tools to help you relieve anxiety, naturally!
​
Picture
0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

In Times of World Crisis: Navigating the Storm Together

15/10/2023

 

Phew... well, this past week has been A LOT to process, hasn't it?
 
I've felt it too, the sense of confusion, helplessness, and overwhelming emotions from witnessing a world and people in crisis. Sick to my stomach reading and listening to the news, hearing the division and clash of words, opinions, and beliefs all over social media on topics that are far away and closer to home.
 
As we’ve seen for hundreds and thousands of years, division brings destruction. Sadly, I have no solution or answers for you.

But I do know that we’ll never be able to right the wrongs of the past with the same thinking that got us here. Often in times like these, when the world-fear and anxiety storm rages I get a little quieter. I go inward to reflect, process my emotions, pray for humanity and peace, and I count my blessings.
 
 I also put in place a few essential practices that assist my mindset:

  
  • Unfollow – it’s ok to mute or unfollow people on social media. If a person's opinions, beliefs or values differ and their content triggers you  just step away. No amount of "reasoning" will ever change their opinion or belief system.

  • Limit the time - it’s also ok to place boundaries around people you will and won’t see if there is potential for conversations that trigger you. Your peace and serenity is most important.

  • Reduce news/social media – checking in once a day, during the middle of the day is my best advice. Waking up in bed scrolling as soon as your eyes open to read the horrific news, or right before you shut your eyes for sleep (when you are less emotionally resilient) isn’t great for your mindset. Even further, when I feel “raw” I ask my husband to filter the news for me and just give me the high level facts.
​
  • Journalling – write out your feelings. As simple as it sounds it’s extremely powerful to get the thoughts and emotions circling in your mind released onto paper. This is the process I share with clients in coaching: “Dear X (person, community, country etc) this is what I have to say to you …” and let your pen flow let it all out.

  • Spead loving-kindness – you may not be able to affect what’s happening in the world on the wider scale, but you can impact the community around us with your good energy. We are all humans living on the same earth, we can pray for unity, peace and humanity.

If you're struggling with feelings of hopelessness and sadness from the weight of division in our world I recorded a special meditation for your this week. It's based on an ancient practice that cultivates goodwill and universal friendliness towards oneself and others. 

Picture
Listen Here
After I have done all I can to tackle my emotions and educate myself on a tough problem, this recording helps me to re-focus my mind and nurture my spirit.
Then I'll perhaps take a walk, listen to music, meet a friend for a chat, eat something nutritious, read a good book, go for a bike ride or take a nap. These are all constructive ways to support my mindset to fill time that might otherwise have been wasted on worry about all the uncontrollable's in our world today. 
​Take care, JB

Picture

​About the Author:
 Janel Briggs is a NLP and Timeline Therapy Practitioner on a mission to support women across Australia and Singapore in overcoming their professional anxieties, imposter syndrome, fears and insecurities to build unwavering confidence and self-belief. Mindset Coaching is about learning how to  become fearless and level up your life and career!
 Connect with Janel on social media via Linkedin or Instagram.
0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

Tapping Into the Magic Within You

8/10/2023

 
Picture
In my line of work it's common for me to see women grappling with self-doubt. Sadly, this lack in belief can be the major cause of our stress, anxiety, burnout and even depression. 

We seem to live in a world where women feel there is a persona or invisible achievement list they have to live up to in order to be "worthy" or "valued".

Watching the Barbie movie recently, this became even more clear to me. (Have you seen it? What did you think of it?)

The gremlin thoughts in our mind often make us feel that if we don't look like THIS, or have THAT, or achieve THIS, then we're failing, "not good enough" or will "never be good enough".

It's a pressure that is hard to comprehend and manage. 

And, if we've experienced knock backs at any stage of our life or career, the journey to quiet the gremlins and get back to self-confidence can be super challenging. 

But I am here to remind you that this journey back to your true self, can also be incredibly rewarding. 
​

Within each and every one of us, there exists a reservoir of magic waiting to be tapped into. Special qualities, characteristics, talents, and brilliance that once recognised helps to light up the world in small or big ways.

Learning how to unlock our magic is how we overcome self-doubt. Your magic sparkles from your qualities, strengths, values and known accomplishments.  ​

Picture
If you're on this journey now - I have created a visual thought starter for you. Take a blank piece of paper, grab a pen, and divide your page into four. Ask yourself each of these questions, and fill in a few dot points for each box.
Confidence blooms from deeply knowing and understanding yourself, embracing your unique qualities, and acknowledging your accomplishments. These elements will help you to go onto look at pursuing your passions.

Mindset Coaching: The Key to Unleashing More of Your Magic

Mindset coaching is a powerful tool that empowers women to shift their perspective, challenge their limiting beliefs, and develop the confidence to pursue their goals.

Here's how THRIVE mindset coaching can further help you tap into the magic within YOU:

1)  Identifying Limiting Beliefs

  • Mindset coaching starts by identifying and acknowledging the limiting beliefs that fuel self-doubt. These beliefs often stem from past experiences, societal expectations, or comparisons with others.
  • By recognising these beliefs, you can begin to break free from their grip and learn how to replace them instead with empowering thoughts.

2)  Cultivating Self-Awareness

  • Self-awareness is a cornerstone of mindset coaching. It involves understanding your thoughts, emotions, and triggers. 
  • When you know yourself and how you operate, it becomes easier to recognise when self-doubt starts to creep in and take steps to counteract it.

3) Shifting Negative Self-Talk

  • The inner dialogue we have with ourselves plays a significant role in self-doubt. Mindset coaching helps women replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations and self-compassion.
  • Instead of saying, "I can't do this," you'll learn to say, "I am capable, and worthy and deserving of THIS (and everything else!)."

4) Setting Empowering Goals

  • Mindset coaching encourages women to dream about the future and set realistic yet challenging goals for yourself.
  • These goals become stepping stones towards building the life and world you want to see and feel. Each small step reinforces your belief in your abilities and brings you closer to unleashing your inner magic.

5) Building Resilience

  • Stress resilience is a crucial trait in overcoming self-doubt. Mindset coaching teaches you to view setbacks as opportunities for growth rather than failures.
  • When you bounce back from challenges, you'll discover a newfound strength within yourself.

Your inner magic is wating to shine. Remember, you are capable and worthy of achieving greatness!
1:1 Mindset Coaching

Honour your uniqueness, own your story, and believe in your capabilities. THIS level of radical self-acceptance is where the magic sparkles within you!


Picture


​About the Author: Janel Briggs is a NLP and Timeline Therapy Practitioner on a mission to support women across Australia and Singapore in overcoming their professional anxieties, imposter syndrome, fears and insecurities to build unwavering confidence and self-belief. Mindset Coaching is about learning how to  become fearless and level up your life and career! Connect with Janel on social media via Linkedin or Instagram.

0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

You can't change them (but you can do this)

24/9/2023

 
Picture
​Have you ever found yourself wishing that someone in your life would change, thinking it would make everything so much better?
​

Many women experience stress, mental and emotional strain as a direct result of the other people's behaviours and actions. 
 
"IF ONLY he/she would do THIS, then everything would be OK!"
  • Stop drinking or smoking
  • Save more money
  • Looked after their health
  • Got a new job with less stress
  • Fixed their (XYZ).
  • Listened to me more!
 
If they would just make "this change" then our life would greatly improve, and I could stop worrying. I know, how amazing would it be if the people we cared about would do what we want them to all the time!!

But here's the sad truth: You can't force anyone to change.

​No matter how much you want it for them or love them, what you say or do for them... only they can DECIDE to make changes in their life.

You cannot control their choices or outcomes. And all that pushing will ultimately cause you more resentment, heartache, stress and pain. 

Which I know is a super hard to hear. I've been there too.

I have multiple people in my life today I would LOVE to see change their ways - but a decade of trying to change them broke me and I had to learn to let it go.
​
I've also seen this frustration in a few of my past coaching clients' relationships. Where women who have journeyed on the path of self-discovery for themsleves now want the same for their partner, sibling, child, or partent. However, in attempting to push them to "see the light" and change their habits and behaviours, they've ended up causing themselves angst.

This is what I can share: You can't change them, but you can be the inspiration for their change.

​Perhaps even a catalyst, by showing them what is possible. The decision for someone to change their life has to be their own, otherwise the transormation may be fleeting or won't stick long term. 

If you can't walk the path for them, what can you do?

Continue to focus on your own personal growth and well-being. Be the light in their life. From my experience it takes patience, but in time you may notice small shifts and improvements both in your life and theirs.

Here are 5 actions you can take:
  1. Accept what is: Acceptance and understanding will always help to remove the negative charge, or feelings within you. Start by reflecting on your own feelings and expectations. Accept that you can't control another person's actions or decisions. Embrace the reality that people will continue to make their own choices.
  2. Communicate your needs: Engage in open and honest communication with the person in question. Share your thoughts and feelings, but do so without trying to force them to change. Instead, aim to understand each other better and find a common ground and let them know what you need in the relationship.
  3. Set boundaries: Establish clear healthy boundaries that protect your well-being and values. These boundaries are life fences that keep out the the energy and behavior you will not allow into your space. Rather than trying to make the other person change you may have to change what you can control a) how much time you spend with them b) when and where you will spend time with them c) topics you will or will not talk about etc.
  4. Lead by example: Be the change you want them to see. Demonstrate the behaviors and values you believe in. Sometimes, your actions can inspire others to become "willing" to change
  5. Prioritise yourself: Focus on taking care of yourself emotionally, mentally, and physically. Seek support from friends, family, a coach or therapist if needed. Your well-being should be a top priority, regardless of whether someone else changes or not.
Remember, while you can't necessarily change someone else, you have the power to change yourself and influence the dynamics of your relationships through your own actions and choices.


​True power is found in changing ourselves and inspiring the change we wish to see in others.
Picture
​

​About the Author:
 Janel Briggs is a NLP and Timeline Therapy Practitioner on a mission to support women across Australia and Singapore in overcoming their professional anxieties, imposter syndrome, fears and insecurities to build unwavering confidence and self-belief. Mindset Coaching is about learning how to  become fearless and level up your life and career!
 Connect with Janel on social media via Linkedin or Instagram.

0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

Shining a Light on Suicide Prevention: Hope, Help, and Healing

10/9/2023

 
Picture
*TRIGGER WARNING* In honour of World Suicide Prevention Day (Sep 10th 2023) This email talks about grief in losing a loved one to suicide, and how you can support someone you love through a mental health crisis.
Three years ago, I tragically lost my dearest friend to suicide.

A beautiful fun-loving soul, the kind of woman who had a smile and laughter that lit up the room. We connected on a deep level, even though she was 12 years younger. I think it’s because we shared similar personal, life and spiritual values. We had an interest in so many of the same things, from learning and travel, to cooking and our love for animals. We loved nothing more than to go for lunch in a cosy cafe and sit chatting for hours over cups of tea.

Her tragic death taught me many lessons about life, the world, the medical system and myself.

I've come to realise the hardest part of grief, in losing someone you love to suicide - is the guilt.

Could I, should I … have done more?

The answer in the mind is always yes. If I had my time again of course I would do so many things differently. 

But, in my heart I know I did the best I could at the time.

Part of the healing process has been to look at my actions and reactions in this event with my mentor and she taught me something extremely important:

Hindsight is a beautiful thing, but no amount of overthinking it will bring peace or bringher back. Acceptance is the key to healing.

I’ve come to realise that my fear of “losing her” in her mental and physical health battle kept my mind clouded and captive.  My voice of fear said:

“What if I say the wrong thing and she dies? I don’t know the answers for how to help her in THIS pain”.

Instead of tuning into my voice of wisdom: 

“You can never say the wrong thing when it comes from a place of love. What if you say the right thing and she lives?”.
​
This is why I am so passionate about helping women with anxiety to learn how to quiet their voice of fear and tap into the loving kindness of their intuition, their voice of wisdom. 
​

By encouraging, understanding, reaching in, and sharing experiences with others, Suicide Prevention Day is about giving people confidence to take action to prevent suicide


​Grief, as you probably know if you've experienced the it, has this way of stripping your heart bare to the darkest depths of your soul. And somehow over time your heart begins to slowly mend the cracks.

I guess is the power of healing and love. 
​But, you are for sure never the same person again. 

The anniversary of her passing each year coinciding with World Suicide Prevention week every September I know as a message for me to remember to, and not be afraid to, tell her story.
​
I will continue to bring light where I can to the darkness. She is worth it, and so are you.

Picture

This is a message for anyone who has a loved one or friend who struggles with their mental health.

Picture

Picture

HOW YOU CAN HELP SOMEONE YOU LOVE IN A
​MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS
 

1.      Listen with compassion, remind them they are not alone and support is available today.

“How would you like me to support you?” or “What can I do to best support you today?”

2.      Help them to put a positive action plan in place to speak with their Doctor, Psychologist or mental health professional as soon as possible.

Remember that this is not solely up to you to fix, it may take a village of support and some time and space for that work to happen.

3.      Add the local mental health support hotline phone number in their phone.

Make the first call with them if needed and start the conversation for them.

“Hello, this is X she has been feeling X and we are looking for some support”

4.      Understand that people in a mental health crisis with suicidal thoughts are typically experiencing an intense negative emotional pain that they just can’t get rid of and this pain feels so big that they don’t know how to move past it.

This pain often makes them feel helpless without options. Ask a few questions to get a feel for the emotional pain or intense stress they are experiencing. Sharing this information with the hotline or medical professional can be helpful.

5.      Do not keep this a secret.

​This is very important. I know there is a stigma and shame attached to suicidal thoughts within our communities. We have to break down these isolating walls. Secrets will only ever keep a person sick. We must bring the dark thoughts into the light in order to have any chance of healing and moving forward

Picture

MENTAL HEALTH FIRST AID

(Training for adults and parents/caregivers of children teens)

Knowledge and resources are what help us to feel more confident and empowered in stressful situations. Did you know there are courses you can take in mental health first aid? Available online for anyone who is interested in learning more about how to support someone through a mental health crisis.

My recommendation for quality online education for understanding mental illness and wellbeing is Meraki Mental Health Training.

​Learn more here:
MENTAL HEALTH FIRST AID TRAINING

Picture

MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS HOTLINES AROUND THE WORLD

​If you or someone you love is having suicidal thoughts, get in touch with one of these amazing and supportive organisations:
 
AUSTRALIA
Lifeline – 13 11 14
Suicide Call Back Service – 1300 659 467
Beyond Blue Counsellor – 1300 22 46 36
 
SINGAPORE
Samaritans of Singapore - 1-767
WhatsApp – 9151 1767
Mental Health Crisis- 6389 2222
 
NEW ZEALAND
Lifeline – 0800 543 354 (text 4357)
Mental Health Foundation – 1737 (call or text)
Suicide Crisis Helpline – 0508 828 865
 
UK
Suicide Prevention UK – 0800 689 5652
Samaritans – 116 123
CALM (evenings)– 0800 58 58 58
 
USA
Crisis Text line – 741741
Lifeline – 988
SAMHA National Helpline – 1 800 662 4357
 
CANADA
Talk Suicide Canada – 1 833 456 4566
The Listening Ear – 517 337 1717 

Picture
0 Comments
read more
Back to Blog

Flip the Script: How to Rewrite A Bad Day

27/8/2023

 
Ever noticed how one little change can set off a chain reaction that shakes up your whole day?

Seriously, it's crazy how something as small as a negative thought, or a random comment from someone's grumpy mood can turn a great start, into a bad day.


Think about it - ever had one of those mornings where you woke up on the wrong side of the bed?


>> Maybe you spilled your coffee, missed your bus, or your child had a stage 5 meltdown over his corn flakes (true story! lol).


And then, BAM!


That bad mood tags along like a dark cloud, messing with your interactions and choices all day long.


It's like that one negative morning experience defines ALL the experiences of your day.


And your thoughts then decide to throw a party and invite all your complaining friends in to gripe all day.

On the flip side have you also noticed how one tiny 'thank you' or a kind compliment can turn things around and give your mood a 180-degree boost. 

​
 It's like a burst of sunshine breaking through the clouds.

Suddenly, you're smiling, your steps feel lighter, and you're ready to take on the world!
Picture

But here's the cool part. We do have a choice; you can choose to react and response, OR NOT.

We often feel like we have NO CONTROL over they day, our mood or emotions. So we go on reacting and responding to everyone and everything around us. 

Imagine what could happen if we stopped giving the negative experience, thought or comment energy??

Here's a few examples of how to flip the script in your mind and rewrite the day:

-> Your spill your coffee - old thought: "I am such and idiot, I don't have time for this, this is going to ruin my day!" (self-criticism)

New thought: "Woops, well that is annoying - I'll go change now." (compassion)

You encounter someone who is rude/grumpy - old thought: "What a jerk, how dare they speak to me like that, why did they have to X - I'm so mad!" (transferred anger)

New thought: "Wow, they must be having a rough day" (deflect the emotion)

Missed the bus - old thought: "Oh great, now I'm late and today is going to hell." (frustration)

New thought: "That's ok, I'll just have to get the next one - nothing else I can do." (acceptance)

And, for the women who just feel like they wake up on the "wrong side of the bed" every day ...

Picture

​Learn to Thrive ... my morning journal is the ONLY answer for that!

Here's why:

Every day you have the opportunity to rewrite your day, by following the prompts to set an intention for your day.
​

You begin your day with  his simple intention affirmation:

"Today I will .... "

  • Be calm and patient with myself today
  • Focus on the good in my life
  • Be responsible for my own emotions
  • Stay in my own emotional lane

By creating an intention for your day you flip the script and become the writer, instead of the audience. I know it seems TOO SIMPLE to be true, but it works. 

Try it, and see?

Ask yourself this:

What is my intention for this week? What quality do I want to bring into today?

​


Picture
0 Comments
read more
<<Previous
Forward>>
Useful Links

Shop
About
Coaching
Free Affirmations List​
Home
Get in touch

Email: [email protected]
Picture
Picture
Stay Connected!
Subscribe and be the first to access new coaching content, news & updates.
SUBSCRIBE TODAY
By clicking “I accept” you confirm that you have read and accepted Janel Briggs’ Privacy Policy and Privacy Collection Notice.
Collection Notice    |     Privacy Policy    |    Terms and Conditions