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    Janel Briggs
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Handling Relationship Conflict in ISO

22/5/2020

 
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Have you been feeling it ?

That little (or big!) bubble of irritation coming up as you look at your partner or kids or house mates... who left this mess? Who's dishes are these? Where did that washing come from? Can you take the kids I am on a call?

It's been a long period of ALL TOGETHERNESS during COVID-19.

Staying home is what we need to do, and through doing the "right thing" our RELATIONSHIPS are being tested.

We've probably never had so much time together in close quarters WITHOUT our external vices or an escape, have we?

Small things that we took for granted like being able to hit the gym, go shopping or meet friends for a catch up are non-existent.

In a research study I conducted in 2019 into Women's Stress and Anxiety in Australia the women who participated in the survey said that:

"Downloading to a friend or family member was cited as the best way to manage their stress and anxiety, closely followed by exercise and scrolling through social media/watching TV".

Our first two "go-to's" for stress release have been taken away, so I'm tipping we've gone ALL IN on the third one though without a doubt! ;)

Which if you've read my blog on 
Calming Your Anxious Mind at Night you'll know the extra screen time has not been ideal for our much needed sleep.

It is no wonder really without our external vices and with the lack of zzzz's that conflicts are arising at home. Behaviours or actions that wouldn't normally irritate us start to build up and really wear thin.


The reason why? We feel constraint. And it is irritating.


We are being told what we can and can't do, when we can and can't do it, and then we have to play the waiting game. It is so against our normal freedoms it feels like a friction.

And who better to take that out on... than the people we love the most. The people who are also feeling all the feelz with us!

We all know we are staying home for the "best reasons" but that doesn't change how it feels.

And no one likes feeling constraint. No one. Certainly not me.

I am unable to work and create and produce anything to my usual capability under home school and ISO restrictions. Are you? It is flat out frustrating. But, at the end of the day I know we are all just doing the best we can to get through.


So, how can you settle the storms at home BEFORE a conflict arises?
​

Watch below. In this video I share a few tips to help you get your mindset right, and relieve that tension before it erupts! A few simple tools to get your through working at home with your partner in ISO!
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​Do you want to be right? 
Or, do you want PEACE?

A simple tool to interrupt the pattern of thought
Shifting the irritated/angry thought  from clouding your mind back down into the body by tapping your fingers and repeating a mantra
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Image credit: Kath Hurley
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