Why Do We Quit on Our Goals?

Have you ever set yourself a goal and then wondered why you never achieved it?

This was a question I asked myself repeatedly 10 years ago when I started my first business. I had big dreams and a plan, but I found myself falling short of my goals over and over again.

It was one of the first reasons I began exploring mindset, coaching, and the psychology of habit change. What I learned changed not only how I approached my own goals but also how I coached others to achieve theirs.

At the time, I was a nutrition coach helping women with weight loss. I ran 30-day clean eating and healthy living programs. I had personally followed the program and achieved amazing results, after my son was born. Despite struggling with imposter syndrome in this new business (a nutrition coach differs from a nutritionist) - I felt confident sharing what I had learned enough to guide other women to do the same.
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But as I worked with different women, I noticed a pattern. 

There were three distinct types of behaviors:

1. The "All-In Achievers" – These women followed the program rigorously, combined it with an intense exercise regimen, and saw life-changing results. Their success felt transformative and long-lasting.
2. The "Moderate Achievers" – These women followed the program somewhat, made small changes, and saw modest results. However, they often slipped back into old habits and returned to the program seasonally.
3. The "Quitters" – These women started strong but gave up around day 10 to 12. They left the program entirely, never to be heard from again!

Because I had experienced the benefits of the program myself, I was devastated when any woman quit. Not just because they didn’t finish the program, but because they quit on themselves.

This experience led me down a path of reading, learning, and experimenting to better understand what causes people to quit and how to help them create lasting habit change.

Why Do We Quit?

Research into habit change provides valuable insights into why people struggle to achieve their goals. Here are three common reasons:

1. Lack of a Clear Strategy – Goals without actionable, step-by-step plans often fail. Without a roadmap, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed to get started or lost along the way.
2. Taking on Too Much at Once – When we attempt to make multiple habit changes simultaneously, it can become impossible to sustain them ALL. Time and energy are limited and spreading yourself too thin often leads to exhaustion. Exhaustion is the thief of all progress when it comes to health and fitness goals! If your body and mind is over tired you’re more likely to reach for a sugar or caffeine hit, and less likely to get up early for your fitness alarm.
3. Weak Emotional Connection to the Goal – Goals that aren’t tied to personal values or have a deep “why” tend to lose their allure when challenges arise. Without an emotional anchor, it’s harder to push through tough moments.

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What the Research Says

​Studies in behavioral psychology support these findings. James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, highlights the importance of focusing on systems rather than outcomes. Goals provide direction, but systems are what drive progress. 

Building habits that align with your goals ensures that your actions are consistent and sustainable.

​BJ Fogg’s Tiny Habits method emphasizes starting small. 

By breaking goals into bite-sized, manageable actions, you’re more likely to sustain momentum and build confidence along the way.

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The Power of Emotional Connection

​One of the most eye-opening lessons I’ve learned is the importance of connecting your goals to your "why." When you tie a goal to your values, passions, and aspirations, it becomes much easier to stay motivated—even when the going gets tough. Visualizing what success will look and feel like can help you create an emotional connection that keeps you committed.

My Advice for Goal Success

If you have a big, audacious goal you want to achieve this year, take the time to create a clear vision. Journal about what it will look like and feel like when you achieve that goal. Write down your “why” and connect to it regularly, so that the positive emotion from the outcome stirs within you.

This clear vision will help guide you when challenges arise.

If you’re feeling stuck or unsure where to start, I’ve created a free New Year Goal Getting Guide to help you map out your vision and build a strategy to stay on track.

I’m also offering 1:1 goal-setting sessions in January and February for those who want personalized support to turn their goals into reality.
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Remember, success isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Don’t let self-doubt or fear of failure hold you back. This is your year to break through.

​- Janel
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​​About the Author: 
Janel Briggs is a certified NLP and Timeline Therapy® Practitioner dedicated to empowering women worldwide to become fearless and thrive through major life transitions. Janel’s confidence and mindset coaching supports women in overcoming imposter syndrome, releasing professional fears and insecurities, and in building unshakable self-belief. Her coaching approach empowers women to rise above self-doubt, embrace their potential, and become aspiring leaders in the pursuit of life and career success.    ​
Connect with Janel:  Linkedin or Instagram.